Monday, May 3, 2010

"The Patricia Singleton Story" Update

My radio interview done by Cyrus Webb of Conversations Live! Radio on BlogTalkRadio on Thursday, April 29, 2010 was a big success.  If you still haven't listened to the interview, you can click on the following link and go and do that now, if you would like to.  When you click on the link, you should go there immediately and the program should open itself onto the interview.

My family and I left town for an extended weekend early Friday morning through early Sunday evening.  While I was gone, people continued to go to Conversations Live! Radio and listen to the interview all weekend long.  When I got home about 8:00 p.m., I had a Tag on Facebook from Cyrus telling me that the interview had already been downloaded over 1,000 times. 

I am in awe that 1,000 people took the time to download the interview and listen to it in only 3 days time.  That is fantastic.  Thank you all.  I have heard through emails and Facebook from quite a few of you letting me know that you liked the interview.  One friend even told me that I sounded very professional.  Several of you have told me that you thought I did a great job of speaking and telling my story.  Thank you.

After Cyrus and I finished the interview on Thursday, I tried listening to it probably three or four times that evening and for some reason, I could not get it to open.  I didn't have much time to devote to it right then because my family and I were packing and getting ready to leave town for an extended weekend in Texas.  When I got home last night (Sunday), I had so many emails to go through in addition to unpacking, I didn't try to access the interview then.  After sending a note to a friend asking for help in connecting to the interview (Thank you, Dan.), I decided to try it one more time on my own.  When I clicked on the above link, it opened immediately. 

I listened to the taped interview for the first time since the actual interview itself.  I was amazed at how smoothly the interview seemed to go.  I loved all of my responses to Cyrus' questions.  I used the word "uh" too many times for a professional speaker, but I am not a professional speaker.  Everytime I used it, I was thinking about what I wanted to say next.  I didn't hear a word of Fantasia's song during the interview.  I was too busy thinking about the next question that Cyrus was going to ask me after the song finished.  I was more comfortable with talking by the time that Whitney Houston's song came along.  I loved what Whitney  kept saying in her song - "I didn't know my own strength."  That is definitely true for me and for many of the incest survivors that I know. 

I remember the silences between me speaking and Cyrus asking the next question seemed much longer when I was doing the interview than it did when I was listening to the recorded interview.  I sounded much calmer in the recording than I actually felt while I was doing the interview.  I was afraid that my voice would tremble like I was trembling inside.  I am usually nervous and very stressed before doing something like this and then once I start to talk the nerves go away.  I have never done an interview before.  I have shared small parts of my story in 12-Step groups and I was even the featured Guest Speaker back in 1990 or 1992 at a 12-Step Club's Anniversary Celebration.  This interview was different in that the inner trembling never stopped.  I was conscious of it the whole time.  I realized that my trembling was a sign of just how important this interview was to me.  It is one of the most important events in my life.  At the time, I did not realize how far Cyrus' radio program Conversations Live! Radio reach is in the world of radio.  No one told me that some call Cyrus, the male Oprah of the Radio world.  I am glad that no one told me before hand.  The night before the interview, Cyrus and I talked through emails.  He was wonderful at calming my fears.  He told me to look at the radio interview as just a quiet conversation among friends.  I found comfort in that.  Thank you, Cyrus.

After listening to the interview tonight, I remembered to tell God "Thank you" also.  Before the interview, I had asked Him/Her for guidance in what I would say in response to Cyrus' questions.  God did a wonderful job in helping me to say what I needed to say in the interview.  I told a friend that God really did a great job of giving me what I had asked for.  The interview isn't the first time that God has made me wait to hear something because Divine timing wasn't quite right yet.  When I tried to listen to the interview on Thursday night, no matter what I did, it would not open.  Earlier tonight, I clicked on the link above and the interview opened immediately.  I didn't have to do anything extra to get it to open.  It worked without any interference from me.  I wasn't meant to hear the interview for whatever reason until tonight. 

I was very pleased with my efforts in this interview.  If you ever get a chance to be interviewed by Cyrus Webb, jump on it.  He is an excellent interviewer.  He does his homework and comes prepared with questions that need to be asked and answered.  The questions can be complicated and can really make you think before you answer them.  That is as it should be.  I hope that this interview will have a quite profound effect on other incest survivors and that it may give them the courage to speak out and break their own silence about abuse.  I hope that just one person will hear my words and say that sounds familiar.  They may recognize the signs in some child and ask if that child is being abused.  They may have the courage to call the authorities and say, "I think this child may be being abused.  Will you check it out?" 

This interview is one of the proudest moments of my life.  If you haven't already listened to it, I hope that you will go to the link now and listen to it.  The interview will be archived so that you can always go to the link below and listen to the interview.   Here is the link again.

After you have listened to the interview, I hope that you will come back here and leave me a comment to let me know what you think.  I look forward to hearing your thoughts.


me as i am said...

Dear Patricia, it is wonderful to hear you speak so proudly of yourself. It sounds so healthily self-loving. And 1,000 listeners holy cow!! that is tremendous!

The positive impact your interview had on me had more than one dimension and I mentioned your interview again in my post today.

Thank you again and peaceful hugs to you :)

Patricia Singleton said...

Katie, thank you for sharing your thoughts about the impact of my interview on you. I thank you for both articles. I will go read the second one now. The impact of my interview in such a short time is amazing to me.

Marj aka Thriver said...

I just listened to it. Fantastic! I, too, thought that it went quite smoothly. I am so impressed by how helpful this interview will surely be for incest survivors, especially survivors who are just newly on the journey of healing and still feeling like they are alone.

I really liked the truths you spoke about self-hatred and taking on the shame and how you overcame that. Wow! So imressed! Kudos, Patricia! Go, you warrior advocate, go! :)

Patricia Singleton said...

Marj, thank you. You do more work as an advocate for incest survivors than anyone else that I know with the work that you put into the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. Thank you for the work that you do. You are a warrior advocate yourself.

Colleen said...

I finally got to listen to it this morning on my way to work!! Oh gosh, Patricia. Where do I begin?
You wrote on my blog today that you are proud of me. Well, I am very proud of YOU! You did such a good job. He did ask good questions, questions that required some digging deep on your part, I am sure, but you answered them all so well. You sounded calm. Your answers were concise. I am sure that they helped other survivors, especially those who have not spoken about it much or gone for help. Your discussion of the effects of sexual abuse, the rage, etc, was right on.
I am glad a lot have listened to it and I am sure many more will as well. You have reached a lot of people. That is what we need to do, as you said, let people know they are not alone.
I am also glad to read that you are proud of yourself, I think I know how you feel. When I gave my witness last year to that Catholic Women's group, I felt like that. It was like - finally, I am here, speaking about my experience and what it feels like to be an incest survivor, and I feel good about it!! I have taken something horrible and turned it around to something good to help others. I felt good about myself. Well, you definitely should feel good about yourself. God bless you.
Well, I better stop now before there is no more room on your blog for comments!! Blessings and hugs!

Patricia Singleton said...

Colleen, thank you and you didn't have to stop. The comments have all been so positive from everyone and they mean the most coming from my fellow survivors. Why, because you do know why it feels like to be an incest survivor. You do know what it feels like to finally have the courage to speak out and to reach out to others from a place of recovery and hope. Blessings and hugs back at you.

Tracie Nall said...

You did an amazing job! Very courageous and you sounded quite professional to me!

Thanks for sharing this!

Patricia Singleton said...

Tracie, thank you. For a first time, I am quite proud of it.

Marj aka Thriver said...

I just saw your comment back to me up there. That was nice. Thanks, Patricia. And thanks for letting us use this post for the blog carnival. Good pick!

Patricia Singleton said...

Marj, you are very welcome. You are my inspiration.