Happy Mother's Day to all of you mothers who may be reading this. My mother-in-law is the only mother that I have left and she is a blessing to me. She sent me a note in the mail this week that I really love. I know that she loves me but she doesn't say it very often. She ended her note with the following:
"I love you a whole lot, just want you to know. Mother Lindsay"
That one little line from her has brightened my week. I really do appreciate that God blessed me with the mother-in-law that he did.
Normal for me was the overreacting or underreacting to all of the stress and trauma and drama in my life that I caused and others caused. Normal is not admitting that I am stressed or in pain. Normal is being afraid and not knowing it. Normal lives in denial of what really is.
Normal is what we know as children and adults living with abuse. I don't want to be normal any more. Normal is living in the patterns of the past and passing them on to my children.
Normal isn't good or even sane sometimes. Normal is shouting at your children because your parents shouted at you. Normal is wanting to do better but not being able to because you don't know how to do better.
Healthy is what I strive to be today. Healthy gives me the ability to no longer be abused or to even attract abusers into my life. Healthy shows me how to make better choices so that I don't pass the abuse on to my grandchildren.
Healthy means I have self-respect, self-worth, and even self-love. Healthy means I can nurture and take care of my needs. Healthy means I know and love who I am at all times.
The sometimes painful part of healthy means that I can feel all of my emotions, work my way through them and release them, most of the time. Sometimes, I still find myself numbing out when I feel overwhelmed by the intensity of whatever I am working on.
Healthy means I do what is best for me. I don't put everyone else's needs and priorities before my own. An empty vessel is no good to anyone.
Healthy means I give you back responsibility for your own life rather than trying to control and fix you. Healthy means I face and take on responsibility for the only life that I can change - mine.
The above words started out as a comment on the Facebook Fan Page for Empowering Solutions which is written by my friend Susan Kingsley-Smith.
"I love you a whole lot, just want you to know. Mother Lindsay"
That one little line from her has brightened my week. I really do appreciate that God blessed me with the mother-in-law that he did.
Normal for me was the overreacting or underreacting to all of the stress and trauma and drama in my life that I caused and others caused. Normal is not admitting that I am stressed or in pain. Normal is being afraid and not knowing it. Normal lives in denial of what really is.
Normal is what we know as children and adults living with abuse. I don't want to be normal any more. Normal is living in the patterns of the past and passing them on to my children.
Normal isn't good or even sane sometimes. Normal is shouting at your children because your parents shouted at you. Normal is wanting to do better but not being able to because you don't know how to do better.
Healthy is what I strive to be today. Healthy gives me the ability to no longer be abused or to even attract abusers into my life. Healthy shows me how to make better choices so that I don't pass the abuse on to my grandchildren.
Healthy means I have self-respect, self-worth, and even self-love. Healthy means I can nurture and take care of my needs. Healthy means I know and love who I am at all times.
The sometimes painful part of healthy means that I can feel all of my emotions, work my way through them and release them, most of the time. Sometimes, I still find myself numbing out when I feel overwhelmed by the intensity of whatever I am working on.
Healthy means I do what is best for me. I don't put everyone else's needs and priorities before my own. An empty vessel is no good to anyone.
Healthy means I give you back responsibility for your own life rather than trying to control and fix you. Healthy means I face and take on responsibility for the only life that I can change - mine.
The above words started out as a comment on the Facebook Fan Page for Empowering Solutions which is written by my friend Susan Kingsley-Smith.
