Men Can Be Raped And Be Victims Of Domestic Violence Too

Over the past five years I have been blessed to meet and become friends with a small number of male survivors online. More groups are beginning to be created to work with male survivors too. As we each come together and heal, the world becomes a better place. Our healing affects everyone that we come into contact with. As more of us, male and female, speak out about our abuse, the less others can continue to live in denial that child sexual abuse is still happening at alarming numbers around the world. Statistics show that almost as many little boys as little girls are sexually abused.

I remember how hard it was for me to break my own silence about the incest and the damage it was still causing in my life years after I left my abusive childhood home. For men, this is even harder to do because of what society expects from men. Men are supposed to be the strong ones and not be allowed tears of release that women are encouraged to cry. Men are men and supposed to be the aggressive ones, not women. Men aren't supposed to be victims of rape but guess what, sometimes they are. We need to change these stereo types. They aren't fair to men. We need to all be safe from sexual abuse as children and as adults.

As I run across more articles about male survivors and male abuse, I will be sharing them here to support my male friends who know what it means to be abused. I will do this to educate society just as I have done for female survivors and children ever since I started this blog seven years ago this month.

Here is a blog article about men and rape and a video from YouTube that makes you think a little differently about men being abused by women. Let me know what you think about both of them Please share this article and the two links with your family and friends as a way to educate them about male survivors. If you are one of those who think men can't be abused or men can't be raped, I hope these two links will change your mind.
Patricia

When Men Are Raped @
http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/male_rape_in_america_a_new_study_reveals_that_men_are_sexually_assaulted.html 

Reaction To Women Abusing Men In Public @
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRCS6GGhIRc 

Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker's 7th Anniversary As A Blog

"Don't spend your precious time asking 'Why isn't the world a better place?' It will only be time wasted. The question to ask is 'How can I make it better?' To that there is an answer."
                                     ---Leo Buscaglia

I haven't seen this quote before this last week when I printed it out as a reminder to myself to keep asking, "How can I make it better?" That was my thought behind starting this blog seven years ago on this day when I posted my first blog article. 

I knew that I wanted to make the world a better place for the next generational of children. I knew that I wanted to be an encourager of other survivors of incest. The past few years, I have added being an encourager of domestic abuse survivors and male survivors to that list as well. 

Seven years ago, the internet had quite a number of female incest and rape survivors speaking out. Over the past few years, more and more males are now speaking out and sharing their own sexual abuse stories. In the past year, I have met more domestic abuse survivors and have come to realize through their stories that I experienced domestic violence as a child in addition to the incest and growing up with an alcoholic. 

According to Blogger.com, my blog has had 244,734 pageviews of 435 posts that have been written and published since June 1, 2007. I wish to thank everyone who has ever come to my blog and read my articles. I hope you found hope and encouragement here. 

Blogger.com says I have 262 followers. Feedburner.google.com says I have 518 subscribers on this day. I thank my followers and subscribers for your loyalty to my blog. Some of you have reached out to me personally and have become my friends. Some of you I know through Facebook and Twitter in addition to your supportive comments on my blog. The number of followers and subscribers has been a steady growth since day 1 of this blog. I appreciate everyone of you. Thank you.

I look forward to another productive year of writing and getting to know more of you as you comment on my articles. I love people and people watching. Have a glorious Sunday on this first day of June 2014. Don't forget to ask yourself how you can make the world a better place.
Patricia

 

Origin Of Name: Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker

I have never explained to myself or anyone else where the name of my blog came from before today. That is because I didn't really get it before today. At the time that I started my blog in June 2007, I didn't understand the significance of the name. I felt guided by Spirit/God to name my blog Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker.  I listened to that guidance even though I didn't understand it, at the time. I have learned to follow spiritual guidance of that kind. It never fails me. God always knows better than I do. Today I got the significance of the name and will do my best to explain it to my readers.

All of my journey though healing from incest, and life in general, has been a spiritual journey, even when I wasn't aware of the spiritual side of it. My healing has taken me on a spiritual journey of reconnecting with myself and with God. I have learned to listen to His guidance through the wonderful mentors that He has guided me to through the years. When those mentors chose other paths that I didn't need to go down then I learned to turn inward and listen to my own inner teacher that God gives each of us because we are his precious children.

I learned that we are all Light Workers who shine our light for those survivors who come after us. Every time we share our healing stories, we are shining our light for others to see that healing is possible. 

I think the reason for making Light Worker into one word instead of two, which my computer considers correct, is because Lightworker is more complete, more whole. It is who I am. It is who you are. It is a new becoming for many of us. It certainly was for me. I am not sure that I fully understand that myself yet so I don't know if I am explaining it well. That part of me is still evolving and so is my understanding. 

I know that many more of us are sharing our stories and shining our lights for others than at any other time in history. I know that together we are stronger than alone. The journey started out with women leading the way to speaking out and breaking the silence of child sexual abuse. Now men are joining us in the fight to light the way for other survivors and to prevent more children from having to join the ranks of survivors who are hurting from what was done to them in their childhoods. When we are big enough and strong enough no one will be able to stop us. No more children have to be abused. We won't shut up until this happens. We are the generation that says no to child abuse.  Much more has to be done before it is stops but each day, I see more survivors - more Lightworkers - joining our march forward and shining their light. Soon the darkness will have no place to hide. We won't let it. 
Patricia

Male Survivor Book Project - 2014 - This Tangled Web

Time is short for any male survivors who are interested in participating in a book project hosted by This Tangled Web. I know this will be a great book project to participate in because I, myself, have participated in 2 similar book projects that were open to all survivors of childhood sexual abuse. 

Here is the "book plan" as quoted from the This Tangled Web website:
"Book plan...To give a platform and a voice to male survivors of C.S.A ...a space for men to share stories, poetry, art work, blog extracts etc to express whatever aspects of the trauma and the healing journey they want to... and to list as many 'tried and tested' resources for male survivors such as websites, possibly other books. A similar format to 'Silent No More' but specific to male survivors."

Here is the link for more information. Please don't wait too long. Time is short if you are male and want to participate in this worthy project.

http://www.thistangledweb.co.uk/male-survivor-book-project-2014/ 

I have some of my writing in the first two books published by This Tangled Web and Kate Swift, the founder. The first book that was "A collection of works by 'Reaching survivors of sexual abuse' R.S.O.S.A Founded by Kate Swift." The name of the first book is Silent No More.  I was just one of 86 contributors - male and female - to this book.

The second book that I participated in with this group of writers/artists/survivors is called Growing Stronger, Growing Free: 'The journey of recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse & the hope for healing'. It too was a collection of writings and artwork by 59 contributors. 

These books are available at  http://www.thistangledweb.co.uk

I am proud to have my name affiliated with both of these books and this great organization. I thank you, Kate Swift, for pulling these projects and survivors together to create these books to help other survivors speak out and tell their stories.

I would like to thank, also, all of my male survivor friends for breaking your own silence and having the courage to speak out and share your stories. It is through our sharing and becoming advocates that we will stop the abuse of more children in the future. Until we chose to finally break the silence of child sexual abuse, no one thought it was possible that it could be happening in their community, in their family, and especially in their own home. We are becoming stronger. Men joining women speaking out is a very big jump forward in stopping our children from being abused. Now the whole story is out there for all to see. I dare someone to try to stay in denial now. We won't allow it. Welcome brothers and sisters to the new abuse-free world that we are creating.
Patricia

Male Abuse Awareness Is Growing

This past week on Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio host Patricia McKnight had a week of Male Abuse Awareness guest speakers. You can find those radio programs at the following links:

Male Abuse Awareness w/Philip Paris - 'MEN CRY ALONE'
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/11/26/male-abuse-awareness-wphilip-paris-men-cry-alone


Male Abuse Awareness w/ David Pittman & Blair Corbett
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/11/28/male-abuse-awareness-w-david-pittman-blair-corbett


Male Abuse Awareness w/ Professor Dean H. McVay, Attorney
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/11/30/male-abuse-awareness-w-professor-dean-h-mcvay-attorney


Male Abuse Awareness Talking Research
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/12/03/male-abuse-awareness-talking-research


Male Abuse Awareness Domestic Violence Victims - 'Shame' the movie
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/12/04/male-abuse-awareness-domestic-violence-victims--shame-the-movie


Male Abuse Awareness Musicians Making A Difference
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/12/05/male-abuse-awareness-musicians-making-a-difference


Male Abuse Awareness Features Bill Murray, Main Event
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/12/06/male-abuse-awareness-features-bill-murray-main-event


Male Abuse Awareness Week Event - Closing it out
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio/2013/12/07/male-abuse-awareness-week-event--closing-it-out

I am pleased to see so many men starting to speak out about their own childhood abuses. Women started speaking out some time ago. Now that men are joining us, the true picture of just how bad childhood abuse really is becomes clearer and less easy for society and families to continue to ignore.  I am honored to call some of these male survivors my friend. The internet is where we all met. You don't have to listen to all of these programs at once. Take your time and listen to them. The programs are archived for listening at your convenience. But please do listen to them and share them with your friends. We all do this to educate others and to offer support to all survivors.

I have one more link that I want to share with you before I close. It is a tribute to a great man and world leader who died this week - Nelson Mandela 1918-2013 R.I.P. This wonderful tribute is written by another male survivor friend of mine who calls his blog "The Wounded Warrior".  Here is the link to the blog article:

http://whatislove-2010.blogspot.com/2013/12/nelson-mandela-1918-2013-rip.html

Hope you all are having a glorious weekend. See you again soon.
Patricia