Saturday, October 10, 2015

Believing You Are Worthy

This morning I was reading another Wayne Dyer book called The Invisible Force: 365 Ways to Apply the Power of Intention to Your Life. It is a daily meditation book that I read several pages each of the past few days. On page 198, it says:

"If you don't believe that you're worthy of fulfilling your intention for health, wealth, or loving relationships, then you're creating an obstacle that will inhibit the flow of creative energy into your daily life."

I do know, that as an incest survivor and a survivor of emotional domestic violence in my childhood home, I am blessed that I married a good man instead of another abuser. My non-existent self-worth could have attracted someone into my life that would have treated me in the way that I thought I deserved. It happens frequently to incest and domestic abuse survivors. Often we recreate our childhood environment until we figure out that we don't have to do that any more, that we do deserve better. 

One way to not attract abusers is to learn and establish healthy boundaries. An article that I read this last week written by my friend Dan Hays at HEALTHY PLACE, America's Mental Health Channel talks about setting up healthy boundaries. Here is the link to Dan's article:

Boundaries are such an important part of healing. Dysfunctional families don't want boundaries, especially the abusers. When I was a child, I used walls to hide behind and to feel safe. The wall let no one in but it also kept me a prisoner inside. Boundaries are flexible. Walls are not. 


Anonymous said...

Thanks for mentioning my article, Patricia! It really fits in with your topic of feeling I'm worth setting a boundary!


Patricia Singleton said...

You are very welcome, Dan. Your article does illustrate my point in writing very well. Thank you for sharing your words of wisdom.

Victoria Kelly said...

I just wanted to say that, I've come to BELIEVE through my Journey, I have come to this conclusion, at least I know, I didn't pick these guys because I've been Abused...
These are perpetrators who watch us and of course put on their best behavior of course.. and then they start anuyou can't get away your told your no good the abuser says you deserved it. my fear and shame and lack of support of family or friends.,
These were the people that they wouldn't let me see...

Patricia Singleton said...

Victoria, Thank you for your comment. It feels like perpetrators do recognize those of us who have suffered from childhood abuse. They see us as someone that they can control because of our low self-worth.