Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Love Yourself And You Will Teach Those Around You To Do The Same

These words are a comment that I posted when I shared a picture from a friend on Facebook. I have so many friends on Facebook and Twitter who, with their shares of words, poetry and photos, inspire me to think and to be a better person. Who inspired you today? Who has been inspired by you today?

Love yourself and it won't matter if others love you or not.

Know you are worthy of love whether another person gives it or not.

Your happiness comes from you, not from anyone else.

I didn't always know these things and I certainly wasn't taught this by my parents. If I loved myself and knew my own self worth, I wouldn't as been as easily controlled like they both wanted me to be. I wouldn't have been sexually abused as a child if I had known these things. Why, you ask? Because if I had loved myself and felt my own self worth, I would have been a child who would have told and rarely are children who are strong enough to tell someone abused. Abusers don't violate children who are likely to tell.

Now I have to get off the computer. My son is due to visit soon from his home across town before he goes to work. His sister, my daughter, is here visiting from Idaho for the week and my husband and I are taking them out to lunch later so we can all spend quality time together.

Have a glorious day and week and life, if you want to. Remember, you are in control of your happiness. Loving yourself makes all the difference to you and to those around you. Love yourself and you will teach those around you to do the same.


Alene Gone Bad said...

Patricia, you inspired me today with your words. I know these things now but did not always know them. They are an important reminder at any time for those of us who didn't have these things ingrained in us from a very early age. I think I have inspired a friend of mine who is going through a rough time in his life right now. The two questions you asked at the beginning of your post are a good thing to ask myself every day, because it allows me to find gratitude for those who did inspire me, and reminds me to find a way to give back. Thank you.

Patricia Singleton said...

Alene Gone Bad, thank you. You inspire me with your healing work and with your races that you train for and participate in. With some encouragement in my childhood, I might would have become a runner. I loved to run as a child and even as an young adult.

Gratitude has made such a difference in my life. Finding something or someone to be grateful for aways gives me a lift in attitude and a change in how I look at the world and its people. That is why I often suggest to others to keep a gratitude journal where you write down 5-10 things you are grateful for every day.

It is good that you can inspire your friend while he is going through a rough period of his life. I bet you do it more than you are aware. Have a glorious day and week. I look forward to your next comment. They always inspire me to write more and to do more to be a better person. Thank you for your comments.

Maureen Sullivan said...

This is very touching. It's essential to understanding your self-worth!

Anonymous said...

Loving yourself is so important but I find very hard to do. I think abuse does not help you to love your self. Well in my experience it did not help me to love myself. Thank you for this message though. I hope you have a nice time with your family.

Patricia Singleton said...

Maureen, Thank you. Most survivors of childhood abuse aren't taught to love themselves.

Patricia Singleton said...

Behind the Smile, Yes, loving yourself is important to your healing process. Loving yourself takes time and patience on your part and you are worthy of being loved.

Thank you. Our daughter is flying home tomorrow. We had a great week of visiting with each other and extended family. We will be sad to see her go and I know she misses her family and they miss her.

Anonymous said...

So strange ~ I was at work yesterday and I was in a situation that troubled and stressed me before enormously. But suddenly I thought:" It doesn't matter what they think. I am doing a good job!" that is self-love as well.
And yes I agree those children who love themselves would tell so that is one of the most important things to teach our children to #stopchildabuse

Patricia Singleton said...

Beth, that shows growth for you. Congratulations. Some people never get that and continue to let what others think about them mean more to them than what they think about themselves. Or they try to become what others think about them rather than being theirselves as it should be. I was a chameleon as a young adult until I found my self-worth and learned that who I was is important. It thought if I could be what you wanted me to be, then you would like/love me. Today, I am me. Many others like me. Some don't. I don't worry about either. I love me as I am, flaws and all.

Vigabo said...

Wise words yet again from you Patricia. Thanks.

Patricia Singleton said...

Cruiseroo, thank you and you are very welcome. Hope you are having a glorious day.

Tracie Nall said...

Loving myself. I do much better with that these days, but there were a lot of years when I was far from ever believing that was possible.

Hope you are doing well.

Patricia Singleton said...

Tracie, thank you for your words. I am doing well. Hope you are too.

Daan van den Bergh said...

I was talking about this with my wife the other day.

It's so important to see yourself as a valuable human being with established, fair boundaries.

For other people it can be a revelation, an inspiration to get to know a strong person. And they might follow you and do the same.

My experience, though, is that people are intimidated and gang up on you. But, whatever, right? :)

Patricia Singleton said...

Daan, I have had a few experiences where people have wanted me to stop talking about the incest and tried to intimidate me into being quiet. They are most often the ones who are in denial and have not dealt with their own incest issues. Denial and fear make some people not open to hearing the truth which is sad to me. I have also had a few people just recently try to intimidate me on Twitter about my stand on child sexual abuse.

I refuse to be intimidated. My dad was a bully so I know how to deal with bullies most of the time. I don't back down on child abuse issues. I don't like bullies. I thank you for your comment here and your comment on Twitter. Conversations are a great way to inform people about child abuse.