For attractive lips,
speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes,
seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure,
share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair,
let a child run his/her fingers
through it once a day.
walk with the knowledge
that you never walk alone.
even more than things,
have to be restored,
reclaimed, and redeemed;
never throw out anyone.
if you ever need a helping hand,
you will find one at the
end of each of your arms.
As you grow older,
you will discover that you have two hands;
one for helping yourself,
and the other for helping others....."
Audrey Hepburn was a true woman of beauty. To have written this poem, she was also a woman who knew her own worth.
I talk to survivors of abuse online every day. Many of them are like I used to be and don't know that they have value to themselves and to others. Self-worth doesn't come from what you do. Self-worth comes from who you are. Self-worth comes from loving yourself.
I learned to love myself by taking small steps at a time.
I learned to meet my physical needs by making doctor's appointments when I needed them.
I made dentist appointments and kept them.
I learned to do things that I enjoyed like learning how to make quilts, taking a drawing class that I always wanted to take, went to see movies to laugh or to cry, danced just for the joy of moving.
I learned to open my heart to those that I love.
I watched others love me until I could love myself.
I let God into my life.
I asked God to show me how to love myself.
I pretended that I love myself until the love was real.
I watched others who were loving and kind and copied them.
I read books about self-worth.
I learned what codependency was.
I stopped trying to control everything and everybody in my world.
I spent time with my children.
I spent time with my husband who loves me.
I stopped being the family hero.
I stopped trying to be perfect.
I read books on spirituality.
I did things that made me feel good about who I am.
I stopped those critical inner voices of my parents that told me I was bad and other things.
I just don't listen to them any more.
I used positive affirmations that built me up inside and made me feel good.
I spent time with people who made me feel good about who I am.
These are just a few of the things that I used to learn to love myself. I know they don't look like much of a list but over time the way I felt about myself changed and I really did love myself. I know that if I can learn to love myself, so can you. I am not any different than you are. Just take baby steps toward loving yourself. You can do it. Don't set yourself up with expectations. Just do what you can each day and one day you will realize that the self love is real. You are worth the effort.