Saturday, May 30, 2009

May Carnival Against Child Abuse

Marj over at "Survivors Can Thrive" has posted the May Carnival Against Child Abuse. There are some very informative articles there written by child abuse survivors like myself. If you are interested in learning more about child abuse, how to prevent it from happening to the next generation of children, or how child abuse can continue to affect your adult life, then go on over to "Survivors Can Thrive" at the following link:
http://survivorscanthrive.blogspot.com/2009/05/remembering-veteran-survivors.html

Here is the word of caution that Marj adds at the beginning of the Carnival articles:
"Trigger Warning: Keep yourself safe as you read. Understandably, child abuse can be a very triggering subject."

The reason for this warning is that most of us who write the articles and some of us who read the articles are Child Abuse Survivors. Certain stories can trigger fear, panic, anger, and even flashbacks in Survivors.

I had some triggers of my own set off over the past few weeks. I have had to deal with a sudden irrational fear of having strangers come into my home. Most of the time I am ok with my husband inviting interesting people that he has met and even some friends into our home. Afterall, he lives here too. I have a few of my friends of my own who have open invitations and come without advance notice.

Because of me writing the recent articles on incest and reading the blogs of other survivors, I have found myself becoming fearful over the past few weeks. That surprised me. I didn't expect it. I told my husband that I know the fear is irrational and I still feel it. I am working through it and telling my husband about it was the first step. As a survivor, I need to feel safe in my own home because as a child, my home wasn't a safe place to be.
Patricia

5 comments:

Ray said...

Irrational fear. I can relate. I call it anxiety and I deal with it every day.

I have a problem with anyone in my home who doesn't live there. I don't know where my personal space issues stem from.

There is also a certain shame associated with a compulsive need to hoard useless items.

Triggers change for me, there is no particular thing that I avoid.

Hope this made since, I have so much going on in my head right now.

Patricia Singleton said...

Ray, it made perfect sense to me. Fears are not always rational. Home was supposed to mean safety when you were a child. If it didn't, that will carry over to your adult life. You are the one who has to make sure that your adult home is safe for your inner child.

Marj aka Thriver said...

Thanks for your honesty about this and thanks for mentioning the carnival. I'm glad you recognized the triggers for yourself and the feelings of fear and are taking steps to stay safe and healthy. You are an amazing example.

Patricia Singleton said...

Thank you, Colleen. Now that I know about the fear, I can work on addressing it. I am at a point in my recovery that often (not always), I can state the fear and that is enough for it to disappear.

Patricia Singleton said...

Marj, your courage inspires me as well. Thanks.