Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Resentment Doesn't Harm Anyone But You

Good afternoon. What a beautiful day it is outside. The sun is shining and the Autumn winds are blowing. Sometime about the wind has always made me feel joy and so alive. As a child, I loved to run in the wind. Of course, as a child, I loved to run any time I could. Walking was just too slow to get me where I wanted to go. I hope that you all are having a wonderful day of healing and growing. 

Over the past few days, I have looked inward to my inner self to deal with some of my own issues. Small ones but they still needed to be looked at so that I don't become resentful. Resentment doesn't harm anyone but me. The other person doesn't even know that is how I feel. Most of us don't share our feelings with those that we carry resentment toward. I am no different than you. 
In order not to hold on to the resentment, I need to look at where it is coming from and how can I let go of it. I do that by looking at the feelings that cause my resentment to come out. This time my resentment came about because of someone else's sense of superiority brought up my feelings of not being good enough and of not being listened to or not having my opinion being valued by the other person. 
I felt like I wasn't good enough and that my different opinion was not being valued twice this week so I needed to look at my own issues rather than getting angry at the other person and creating drama and getting drawn into an argument. I can't help that the other person believes he/she is superior to everyone else. That is his/her problem, not mine. I can only deal with the feelings that come up in me. I have come to know for myself that a person with a superiority complex also has a frightened little child inside but I can only deal with my own frightened inner child, not theirs. 
When I realized that my feelings came from the years of living with my emotionally abusive rageaholic dictator dad, I could let go of the resentment that had been building in me over the past few days. My value doesn't come from another person, especially someone else who believes he/she is superior to everyone else. I don't need to hold on to the resentment or even be angry with the other person. 
I can forgive myself for feeling less than good enough. I can know that my value is not dependent upon another person hearing my opinion or not. My self-worth comes from loving myself. I give me value, not another person. I hope my words help someone else who may be struggling with feelings of less than good enough today. You are always good enough. Anyone who brings up those feelings of less than in you isn't your friend. They don't deserve you or your time. 
You can all do your own work of healing when these kinds of issues come up for you. I am no different than you. We all hurt and we all can heal. Don't let another person's behavior send you into a tail spin of low self-worth. That is the objective of a person with a superiority complex. Don't play their mind games. You will never win and the sad thing is they think they do win but they don't. Superiority or inferiority complexes both keep you in the pain rather than helping you to heal. Resentment isn't your friend either. Let go of it. You deserve joy and peace.
Happy healing. Enjoy your day.


Pat said...

So true, Patricia. Resentment only harms us.

Just wanted to let you know I nominated you for the Dragon's Loyalty Award on a post at my site (http://plaintalkandordinarywisdom.com/a-special-thank-you-dragons-loyalty-award/). I'm happy to share you with my readers. :-)

Patricia Singleton said...

Pat, Thank you so much, my friend, for the honor. I appreciate your Dragons Loyalty Award and your friendship.