Friday, March 27, 2009

Who Would You Be Without Your Story?

Byron Katie's newest book is entitled Who Would You Be Without Your Story? Dialogues with Byron Katie. I have been reading this book for the past several weeks. I just finished it this morning. It is a fantastic read. I would recommend it to anyone who wants peace in your life.

The book is a collection of dialogues between Katie and the participants of a workshop that she did. It gives actual conversations where Katie takes the person through the steps of what she calls The Work. Here is a list of several of the titles of the dialogues:
Joe is Irresponsible
My Mother Wouldn't Approve
I Can't Stand It That George Fell in Love with Linda
Cancer Ruined My Life
I'm Not Enough---and Some People Are Better Than Others
My Father Abused Me

Katie teaches you that when you believe your thoughts about other people, the world, and your own selves that you suffer. She says that suffering is optional. By choosing what you believe, you get to choose whether to suffer or not. Seeing your thoughts for what they are, the imagination of your mind, you can end all of your suffering.

This process involves doing inquiry of yourself with the use of four questions:
"Is it true?
Can you absolutely know that it's true?
How do you react when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without that thought?" (page viii, Who Would You Be Without Your Story?, Dialogues with Byron Katie)

The first thing that The Work has you do is to write down your judgments about any stressful situation that you are dealing with in your life. These situations can be past, present or even something that you worry might happen in the future. How many times do you find yourself reliving the past or worrying about the future? Katie asks you to write about every person that you haven't 100% forgiven. She says if you only have 1% that you haven't forgiven, that your thoughts about that person are still causing you to be suffer. Any time that you are stressed out, you are suffering from the beliefs that you have.

On the last page of Katie's book, you will find a page that gives you a copy of her "Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet". You can also find a copy of this worksheet online at Byron Katie's website: under the Resources section.

Albert of Urban Monk.Net ( ) suggested to me over a year ago that I look at Byron Katie's books. Albert thought that they might help to resolve some of the issues that I was facing at the time. At the time I bought the book Loving What Is but I didn't read more than a few pages. The timing wasn't right for me to get her message. Now that I have read Who Would You Be Without Your Story? , I will go back and read the first book. I am ready to do The Work now. I hope that you will join me in reading these books and in finding peace in your own life by doing inquiry into your thoughts and beliefs.
Have a glorious day.


Albert | UrbanMonk.Net said...

Hey Patricia - Glad you're finding the beauty of the Work. It also took me a long time before I could get into it, like many people, it does take a while for things to "click", and strangely it's when we stop looking for a magic bullet that the magic bullet actually starts working for us.

Thanks for the link :)

Leon Basin said...

Hey, how are you doing?

Patricia Singleton said...

Albert, you are welcome for the link. Thank you for introducing me to Katie. I agree about things suddenly clicking. I learned a long time ago that when the timing is right, things just flow together as we need them to.

Patricia Singleton said...

Leon, from your comment, you would think that I knew you. I don't. I did go to your blog to check you out and even left several comments on articles that I liked.

I am well, thank you.
Have a glorious day.

Marj aka Thriver said...

Oh, I like Byron Katie. I've done some of the work. I had a psychiatrist introduce me to her writing several years ago.

Glad to see you on the CAS network. I hope you are doing well.

Patricia Singleton said...

Marj, I am well. It was good to find you on the CAS network as well. I spent some time there today. It is good to find a place that supports the work of survivors.

Liara Covert said...

Patricia, Byron Katie's books are useful tools that empower people to become more aware of how and why they think as they do. KNowing is the first ste toward choosing to deliberately change what is not working or is no longer compatible with how you view your evolving self. The four questions highlighted are especially useful.

Patricia Singleton said...

I am reading my second book by Katie and loving the awarenesses that I am already noticing in myself.

Positively Present said...

I completely agree that suffering is optional. I think this sounds like a very interesting book and I'm definitely looking forward to reading it. Thanks for sharing it!

Patricia Singleton said...

Positively Present, you are welcome. YouTube has some videos of Katie demonstrating The Work that I stumbled across sometime in the past year as well that are great to watch. Sometime this week I am going to see if I can find them again.